People ask me all the time where we get these things. And the answer is in 3 ways: we write them, we find them, or-like today-they are sent to us. In this case, today’s edition comes from an old friend of the show, our first traffic reporter, Paula Parez. Upon first read, it was just funny to me. However, upon a second glance it occurred to me, like classic Mark Twain, absurd humor and sarcasm are sometimes the brightest spotlights one can cast on issues, so…
Everyone concentrates on the problems we’re having in this country lately: illegal immigration, hurricane recovery, alligators attacking people in Florida-not me-I concentrate on solutions for the problems — it’s a win-win situation.
* Dig a moat the length of the Mexican border.
* Send the dirt to New Orleans to raise the level of the levees.
* Put the Florida alligators in the moat along the Mexican border.
Any other problems you would like for me to solve today?
Think about this:
2. The Constitution
3. The Ten Commandments
COWS-Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.
THE CONSTITUTION-They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq. Why don’t we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and our government is apparently intent on finding ways no to use it anymore.
THE 10 COMMANDMENTS-The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this: you cannot post ‘Thou Shalt NotSteal’ ‘Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery’ and ‘Thou Shall Not Lie’ in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment.
Also, think about this. If you’re in your car right now saying, “Oh, I can’t believe he just read that…but I agree with it. I could never do that, it might offend someone.” YOU ARE PART OF THE PROBLEM!
And that’s something you can hang your hat on.